There is no shortage of people willing to tell us how things are in the world on both the grand and intimate stage. I’ve just moved to a new city. It’s both exciting and daunting. While it is important in so many ways, to get the lay of the land as it were, to see through the eyes of more than one’s self, caution is necessary.
There is the risk of simply assuming they— and there are many “they” to be had — are correct and in that assumption close off to any nuance or increase of perspective we may have. Of course, not all information and opinions are equal. We look to masters in every category and weight accordingly but this too must, as all in all data, move through our individual mind. It is of necessity colored by our emotional response and never taken in as neutrally as we like to believe.
We face this every single day in ways big and small. Who do we believe? Where do we place our trust? Yes, we aspire to trust in self, to have our own opinion which means we must first have our own experience, but again, this is never neutral to begin with. We come to the table with likes and dislikes firmly in place, all colored by our past experience and knowledge. We look to increase and refine that knowledge as it should be but something more is necessary.
To see with new eyes, with clear eyes, sounds promising but in reality, is so very hard to do. I long to throw up the neatly ordered deck of cards I keep in my pocket and see where they land, what new order arises and to surrender; to have the courage, the full weight of possible knowledge, the skill at hand to act efficaciously on that reshuffling.
The world does have building blocks. There is a certain order but where does that order arise? How does it arise? In the non-dual Śaiva Tantra teaching this is the purview of krama-śakti. The cosmic sequence generator. Know this more intimately, align with this power and the cards dance.
What shapes itself inside you moment by moment? What dictates, our likes and dislikes, our interests and personality? Why are we drawn toward or repulsed away?
Experience is a great teacher and in that, leaves a strong imprint. Keep the information and release the often too powerful emotional response that causes one to immediately cling or avert without reason. Meditate.
Resting awareness in the nirvikalpa, the non-conceptual, permits an opportunity to shape closer to the source what arises on the conceptual surface. And in that to act more skillfully, closer to our dearest values. Meditate.
As I navigate this new place, searching for home, for how I may fit in, how I may serve, I am keenly aware of what I bring to the mix. In my desire to belong, I am compelled to sit and face my Self.
Gratefully I meditate. I am growing in my self-sufficiency, and still, a friendly hand, a kind word, an opinion offered is so very welcome. Yet all of it, is ultimately up to me. There is responsibility and freedom in that and I wish to be ready. Meditate.